II: I want a readership

It's a thing I've been thinking about a bit lately. When I'm not thinking about/dealing with the issues going on in my life lately. I mentioned that a bit in the last blog entry I think. I'm still hanging in there, and things are moderately better now than they were then.

But anyways, I want a readership. I want one because here are some stories that I love so much, and I only have a few people talk to about them. The stories I (as a writer) have made, I care so much about. I want to be clear that my reason for writing is expressly not fundamentally for people to read/enjoy my writing, but I (as a reader, almost) want to yap to people about things I care about and hear people yap about those things too. It's true of physics, math, philosophy and yuri too, to name a few other things I care about, but of course more people are aware of those things than my stories specifically.

The thing that feeling has been bringing me to lately is the idea of a readership. In the form of some space where I can do that, like a discord server or something of the like.

I wouldn't want to speak in it as a writer though. The only speaking I do as a writer is through my works themselves (and perhaps additionally really thorough and complex yapping about aesthetic philosophy, which is really not about any of my specific works, but usually more my reasons for making my works in general and separately art in general).

To put my feelings on it into very rough words, any detail is either confirmed in the writing or it's not. If it's not, then what I'm saying is inherently not the full picture, because every other option still exists within the story too. And if it is, then me saying something gives no new information fundamentally speaking. That's a little of why I don't generally speak as a writer, and I hope it makes sense.

I'm generally fine with talking about myself as a person and what I went through in writing a thing though, and of course what I think of any specific pieces of my writing.

I also want to be clear, I don't particularly want any fame or a 'public image' or anything like that. Even ignoring all the issues with that, I just wouldn't particularly want it. Not really in physics either to be honest. I would like to be a great physicist like the ones who are super well known though, in the respect that I'd like to be able to understand that much and contribute that much understanding to what is known by humans of physics. And also because I'd like to be in a position to change/influence a few things about how physics is done, since there are certain cultural aspects related to it that I don't really like which unavoidably affect me and others now.

But anyways yeah, a readership would be cool. I said this in my last entry, that I feel like nobody's reading even though I'm sure there's at least one person probably, so I want to say to you potential one reader:
If you've read some of my work and thought it was neat or interesting and want to talk to me about it, do reach out to me. I would give my discord or something here, but I feel like that's maybe a bad idea? So, my email is eleanor.ecswriting@gmail.com, though I don't check it super often, and if you use Slowly (an online penpalling app) you can add me with the ID ZVKW5DM and send me a letter :)